June 24, 2015
There have been varying levels of busy-ness in my life – none that I am proud of as I don’t equate being busy with being important or doing something of value – but I have to say, I don’t think I’ve ever felt the pressure I feel these days to perform until every ounce of energy has been sucked dry.
In the past couple months since I took a hiatus from writing journals online, I have been traveling to fitness expos, moving homes, and building a new elderly care business while operating a household and caretaking the children. At the end of each day I don’t have any mental might to write an inspiring journal entry or even finish reading the book I started 7 months ago. I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t say what was on my mind…that I was really, really tired. That sometimes I feel like I scream more than speak sweetly to my children. That my tummy feels bloated from stress, watermelon, and even green beans! I don’t want to complain. I don’t want to focus on negativity or feel paralyzed by my to-do list. I don’t want to hesitate, not for a single moment, because doubt will create fear, fear will create mistakes and mistakes will lead to failure.
And I can’t fail.
I have to make it to school, sports practices and games across town. I must send out emails, return phone calls and attend meetings. I need to finish payroll, update projects and record podcasts. I will stop at the bank, post office, care home and grocery store within a 40 minute period. And I will commit to my No Excuse Mom workouts, family events and school field trips. After each commute, I will clean out my car of crumbs, trash and toys. At the end of each day, I will shower tweeze my eyebrows, apply moisturizer and use eye cream. After every bedtime story, the laundry will run, the dishwasher will be loaded and I…I will be here, answering emails, updating projects and (hopefully) writing a long, overdue journal entry.
I can’t fail because my employees, my nonprofit organization and my children depend on me to follow through. Every. Single. Day is about following through. It’s getting from Point A to B, without excuses. Just get it done.
People develop strength from pain….from pushing themselves, from testing their limits and getting mentally, physically and spiritually fatigued by the process. Do I want balance, sure. But there is nothing balanced about getting to a new life destination. In order to move out of complacency, you need to break the routine, challenge your life’s status quo and move away from homeostasis. When the dust rises and your world is in motion, you may not see your destination or feel stable in this journey, but eventually you will stop. The dust will settle. And you will find balance again.
As Greek Philosopher Heraclitus said, there is nothing constant but change.
Even when we think nothing changes, life is constantly moving. Our skin cells are renewing, our taste buds are regenerating, our children are growing, our earth is moving and our life is evolving. Control, stability and permanence is an illusion.
This is why I work hard, play hard and live hard. This sprint won’t last long. The quiet moments won’t last long either (and I’ve had those too!) And this life…this life will not last long either.
Live life full force, without regret and with incredible passion. Don’t just be busy moving, be busy living your life to the fullest. Everything will pass – and this moment, this crazy, busy moment in my life….this will pass too.
I always enjoy connecting with NEMs (No Excuse Moms) everywhere! Join your local group by searching here: www.noexcusemom.com/locations We will be in Anaheim in August!