Surrendering to my path.

    November 28, 2022

    In all my years posting online, you’ve never seen me post about a birthday celebration Most of my life I’ve always been pensive, melancholy and seeking solitude on my birthday. The question “Why am I here?” has plagued me since I was 4. There must be more than working, marrying, having kids, buying a house, retiring, traveling and dying. It can’t just be about social media posts, soccer games, buying annual holiday presents and seeking our next achievement – whatever…

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  • My Mirror’s Reflection…

    Late May, after a deep and emotional conversation – I noticed the skin around my lips become uncomfortably dry. As I prepped for my stepdaughter’s birthday, I would press a napkin against my lips…

    August 17, 2022
  • Getting Lost.

    He asked me how I felt. I don’t feel anything. I don’t feel happy nor sad. I’m pensive, but also not thinking of anything at all. I just exist throughout my day without attention,…

    July 22, 2022
  • Becoming “Maria”

    Late last year I did something very “Maria”…. I picked up the phone and called David’s ex wife. After nearly 15yrs watching them battle it out (and being told to stay out of it)…

    July 4, 2022
  • Following my heart.

    Months ago I sat in my office midday, feeling despair, disconnection and division after (another) explosive argument with my husband. In my grief, I took out a piece of paper and wrote two letters.…

    May 30, 2022
  • My Spiritual Journey

    If you were to read my earliest blogs, it’s astounding how so little has changed. When I began this website, I was 25, single and living in San Francisco. In 2005 the world had…

    April 9, 2022
  • Seeing the gaps.

    March 16, 2022 I’ve been seeking small pauses in my life. They aren’t big, normally they last for one second – but it’s the moment when you realize you are in transition, aware or…

    March 17, 2022
  • Letting Go.

    Last year I let go of a lot of things in my life. In fact, “letting go” has been a big part of my mantra both then and now. So I started letting go…

    February 17, 2022
  • What’s Your Story?

    January 31, 2022 There was a ten year challenge floating around Facebook recently and I decided to recapture an image I took when the boys were 3, 2 and 8 months. It was a…

    January 31, 2022
  • 2022 Intentions

    My Ten Intentions for 2022: 1) Grow my hair. I miss french braids, wavy curls and I think I look younger.I want to go back to my roots (literally!) 2) Speaking of age…I will…

    January 11, 2022