Swimming with Nature

May 8, 2007

May 8, 2007

I can’t find my cell phone. I’ve been without it for over 30 hours now.

I looked in all my bags, my car, Spencer’s place, my parent’s house….nowhere! Honestly, while it’s annoying, it’s also very, very liberating. I have been guilty for 3am blackberry emailing exchanges… driving while texting…checking my emails while performing cardio…talking on the phone while at a register. How annoying!  These days, (and especially today) I have attempted to stray away from the constant need for connection, technology and information.

I spent this past weekend in L.A. where I visited Dave at Max Muscle’s corporate office, celebrated Cinco De Mayo downtown, attended a wedding in Marina Del Ray, and enjoyed some special time with Spencer’s beautiful family.

And by the way – I am feeling MUCH better this week. It’s been a battle, but I’ve been slowly taking  myself out of the semi-depression I was in.

This morning I woke up, grabbed a book from my collection; read, slept, read, ate, unpacked, slept, sunbathed, read again…it was great. I needed it. In fact, most days when I’m fully relaxed happens just as such. By the end of the night I jump roped while walking Tiger after attending a 90th birthday party for a wonderful elderly widow named Ruth.

Each day I’m realizing more and more where my path is going…I’ve recollected all past success, all present opportunities and all future desires – I took these conclusions and assorted it with my inborn talents and natural flow activities…

And now I’m muddling in the need for some serious action before I leave in exactly one week.  Due to all the ‘new-ness’ in my new life situations, it’s sooo hard to write anything right now. I can’t be inspirational, motivational or intriguing right now because I’m experiencing way too much stuff to see anything in perspective. At this point, it’s also really hard for me to be as open as I have been in the past considering I feel so flawed in my thoughts right now.

We all experience ‘stages’ in our life – in fact, in reality, while I’m a pageant/fitness competitor: I’ve only competed a total of 2.5 years in the last 8 years. While I’m a writer: I’ve published most of my work during ‘highly creative’ moments in the year…and while I’m a traveler: I only travel internationally 3 weeks out of each year.  People are always astonished at the amount of time I spend on writing, training, traveling, teaching and working on various projects. But the fact is…is that I do it when the time is right, I stop when the time is wrong and in the end I always remain consistent throughout my weeks, months and years of my life.

While in Hawaii a couple years ago, I learned a similar lesson while snorkeling. In attempt to swim as far out as possible, I kept forcing my body’s strength against the will of the tide going against me…after not moving with agile and speed I finally started allowing my body to move with the natural motion of the waves. When the water was still I rested my heart, when the tide pulled me left,  I swam as hard as I could in that direction….after only 10 minutes of working with the will of the waves, I was so far out from shore. I did more in 2 minutes than what I had done in 30 minutes attempting to work against the forces of nature.

Right now, I’m swimming with nature – driving as hard and as fast as I can while the adrenaline of courage and risk is still fervent in my blood. Eventually, the strength achieved from past adversity while assist in this journey …but right now, I’m working with the will of my internal nature.

When the sun hits my bed tomorrow – after I stretch after my morning training session – when I visit old friends and read new books… I’m so excited to live tomorrow with absolutely no assumptions of how the day will unfold.

Journal Pictures – May 8, 2007

Photo taken in the car this past weekend in L.A.

With Dave at Max Muscle Headquarters.
That’s my published pictures in the background next to his right ear!

No – I didn’t catch this.