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Life

Look beyond the police officer.

September 25, 2020

Yesterday my husband came to me and said, “I was just in our son’s room and was looking at all his soccer medals he hung on his wall. It made me realize that he has played every year of his life since he was 4.” Our son is now 11. I looked at him and said, “you know why, right?” He looked back at me – knowingly… When our son graduated from being cradled in my arms, then crawling on…

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Under Attack….

June 16, 2020

Our country is in a period of unrest. There are protests, riots, looting and debates regarding the systemic racism that has unfairly effected African Americans for hundreds of years. Despite being a minority who studied American History and the forecast of a potential race war (as a result of systemic racism) – I have also underwent public scrutiny. Either I am too quiet, too loud, too opinionated, too complicit, too positive, too involved, or too uninvolved. I’ve been told from…

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Let’s Make America Better. (together)

May 27, 2020

Someone recently told me they hated seeing patriotic home decor because they didn’t like our country. The proud American in me responded, “Well why don’t you move if you don’t like it?” While this person left insulted, I realized in my reflections, that I shouldn’t have responded in that way.⁣ ⁣ It’s ok to not be ok with your country.⁣ ⁣ It’s ok to get irked by patriotic decorations.⁣ ⁣ What’s NOT ok is hating something and doing nothing.⁣ ⁣…

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Week 9 in Social Isolation…

May 4, 2020

On March 7th 2020, we received an email announcing our school district closure due to one student’s extended family member contracting covid-19. My niece was hours away from her now-canceled junior prom and my son just finished his first and soon-to-be- last Lacrosse game of the season. We went into fear mode. We were nervous about our elderly carehomes, our high-risk parents and our family. I haven’t seen Costco in months, I bought FB portals so our elderly residents can…

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How to Process this Pandemic.

March 31, 2020

After weeks of sulking, I think I’m finally out of it. It started with shock, after the kids school was abruptly canceled. Then anxiety, when a friend’s father tested positive for Covid-19. Then I was depressed, when I canceled multiple trips and upcoming events. Then I was sad, when I saw my mother suffer from health issues and was sent to the hospital. My knee hurt from running wrong. My belly hurt from eating wrong. But most of all? My…

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My family’s unfolding of the Coronavirus

March 27, 2020

A couple months ago my husband started a family chat that made it seem like the ‘sky was falling’. Nearly daily he gave updates on the mysterious virus overtaking Wuhan, China.  We minimized his concern by noting the high fatality of the flu virus and disbelief it would affect us here in Elk Grove, CA. So, I went about my life, literally planning for several trips to L.A., an expo in Hawaii and a trip to Spain – all within…

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How do you know you’re alive?

February 25, 2020

“Why do I always feel like I’m in a dream?” Perplexed, my doctor didn’t know how to answer my son and instead questioned, “Well, how do you feel?” He replied, “I feel like nothing is real.” In an effort to save the doctor I interjected saying, “Honey, if you ever feel like you’re in a dream, just pinch yourself. Do that now (as he pinches his wrist). Do you feel that?” He nods. “Well that’s how you will know.” I’m…

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The 3 people you need in your life.

October 22, 2019

A couple months ago, while driving home from a No Excuse Mom meetup, I saw a fellow member, Kimmy, walking home. I slid down my window and said, “Hey, you live near me! Do you want to go running sometime?” (I’ve seen her run before) She agreed and we both scheduled a 6am run in two days. Asking her to run that day was going to benefit me in multiple ways. I wanted to started getting up earlier. I wanted…

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A Real Apology….

August 14, 2019

Dear Followers, I’m sorry. I don’t like regrets, but I have a few in life. As I look at my scarred, numb and deflated breasts today, I regret ever thinking they weren’t good enough. I fell into the insecurity trap. I remember the day I made the decision to augment my breasts clearly. I didn’t research. I never thought about needing or wanting it before. But, when I was told it was something I “had” to do to win –…

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13 days post-explant surgery

July 11, 2019

July 10, 2019 This time two weeks ago I was preparing for my breast explant surgery. I was cool as a cucumber, anxious but ready to get this surgery on the road. I’ve been wanting to explant for years but was nervous about the risks, the recovery and the reality that I wasn’t born with fuller breasts. The chronic fatigue, joint issues, heart palpitations, chest pressure and inflammation was still aggressively impacting me. Instead of staying nervously awake, I was…

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