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What if I fly?

October 29, 2015

October 29, 2015 Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could To where it bent in the undergrowth; Then took the other, as just as fair, And having perhaps the better claim, Because it was grassy and wanted wear; Though as for that the passing there Had worn them really about the same, And both that morning equally…

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Living Life Online.

August 10, 2015

I have lived a decade of my life online. Since 2005, around the time I was hitting my mid-twenties crisis, I started blogging to a public abyss of followers who watched and read as I detailed my reflections each week on a Sunday or Monday night. Like my life today, I didn’t hide much. I openly and transparently wrote about finding my passion, struggling with disordered eating, quitting my corporate job, starting my nonprofit, moving home to care for my…

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This Too Shall Pass…

June 25, 2015

June 24, 2015 There have been varying levels of busy-ness in my life – none that I am proud of as I don’t equate being busy with being important or doing something of value – but I have to say, I don’t think I’ve ever felt the pressure I feel these days to perform until every ounce of energy has been sucked dry. In the past couple months since I took a hiatus from writing journals online, I have been…

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It’s not you, It’s Me.

April 22, 2015

April 22, 2015 It’s not you, it’s me. That’s what I told all the social media pages I began ‘un-following’ this past week. I decided it was time to censor constant posts and pictures of perfect bodies, blissful marriages and successful careers. I couldn’t look at it anymore given my internal struggle to stay positive while arguing with my husband, finding a new home, promoting my first book and operating a crazy household. I wasn’t jealous of those who outwardly…

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How I Saved Myself.

March 13, 2015

March 10, 2015 I’ve waited a long time for this single day. From the moment I was first published at 11 years old for an honorable mention about an injured bird, to the day I won second for an 8th grade poem about changing the world titled, “One Day”. I knew I wanted to be a published author. I would write short stories, create small screenplays (that I acted with my siblings) and even send queries out to literary agents…

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February 17, 2015

Nothing great comes without sacrifice. So it’s no surprise when people assume I have an unclean house, am an absent parent or have a shallow personality because I am in good health. Obviously – something had to give, right? I didn’t know what those sacrifices were until recently. In this last year, I’ve had little open time as I toiled from sun up to sun down, often rushing to walk my son to school, training hard through a brief workout,…

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Everything that went wrong in 2014

December 31, 2014

From severe acne, weight gain, war zones and betrayal – how everything that went wrong, really went right in 2014. Like most, I began this year with high hopes, a set timeline and a desire to hit resolutions. Despite ending the prior year at a low after being banned by Facebook for supposed hate speech, I was ready to take my newfound public platform and motivate others to stop making excuses. In January, I launched the No Excuse Mom Movement,…

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Life’s Exploitation.

December 23, 2014

The first time I felt exploited was in 2003, right after placing top five in two national fitness competitions. While waiting for two post-contest photoshoots, I watched as colleagues pose suggestively in thong bikinis at the hotel pool. I saw as our hard earned physiques was being used and exploited by photographers, magazines, companies and contest promoters to gain money. I canceled both shoots scheduled that day and left Los Angeles alone in my Honda CRV, driving home to Sacramento…

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New Beginnings…

December 4, 2014

I was betrayed today. I woke up and received a notification that my Instagram password and email was changed. I could see who the perpetrator was and in shock, called her immediately, but she didn’t answer. I haven’t spoken to her for some time and relieved her from being our NEM Instagram manager months prior. I discovered that she renamed the account and told thousands of No Excuse Mom followers that she rightfully felt what she built was hers. Suddenly…

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Pilgrimage to the Holy Land

September 12, 2014

Are you ready to die? I often ask myself this question. As a child I wondered about the vastness of the world and my complete obscurity compared to the billions of people who exist. I asked why life felt so unfair, almost left to fate – whether or not we would be born with the advantages of clean water, surplus food, a protected environment and strong genetics. After all, we aren’t given a choice what country we are born in…

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